A disease is sweeping across the Milky Way in Universe 57. Symptoms are characterised by bouffant hair and an over-sensitive outlook. Some victims report a rash and patches of orange that spread indiscriminately over the skin. Extremities shrink, and victims are often plainly distressed by this, waving their tiny hands with often irritating enthusiasm. Doctors are calling the illness ‘Fake News’ and while the effects of it seem like a source of comedy, it poses a serious threat to the System community.
Fake News causes a dangerous conviction in a shared delusion. Victims are absolutely certain that someone else is the cause of all their problems despite obvious evidence otherwise. Other victims have reported an increase in intellect, however, with confidence that Fake News keeps them more informed than the rest of the galactic populace. Some even say that Fake News even proves they are perhaps more intelligent than the rest of the community. Here on the Space Rock we believe that this could just be another form of the Fake News delusion.
When did Fake News start? No one is sure of the exact date that fake news first spawned, but a popular theory claims it all begin sometime in November 2016. What exactly is Fake News? We’ve been told that the symptoms of Fake News are caused by a parasite that aggressively reproduces and is indiscriminate in its victims, although curiously divisive in its symptoms, often separating large groups of people from each other.This does not seem to diminish its spread. Research shows that as the victims of the disease are overpowered by new and numerous prejudices, they become very vocal about their opinions. This passionate confidence in their new beliefs allows them to overcome these divides, if only to yell about them in the faces of those they now discriminate. This only causes the parasite to spread further through the galaxy. Where did Fake News come from? Sources tell us that Fake News came from nowhere. “Don’t ask me, I don’t know, I’m perfectly healthy, the picture of health, no one is healthier. It was probably started by those-” We were not able to find any more information as the Spitter post was deleted before we could read any further. So who is at risk of Fake News? The answer is frightening: anyone can become infected. All it takes is exposure to other sentient beings and the parasite is liable to take root. Theoretically, it is spread through something doctors are calling ‘hot air’. In other words, when your neighbour accidentally spits on you mid-rant about the ‘foreigners’ that moved in down the road, the parasite can be transferred from them to you in those little specks of saliva that landed on your face. Scientists specialising in system parasites have under taken extensive research to find out if the disease is transferred in other ways as well but we at the Space Rock are suspicious as to the motives of some of these “doctors”. With Fake News on the rise, how can we trust anything anyone says? What is the future of Universe 57? Experts say that there isn’t much the inhabitants of other universes can do for 57. The best advice we have for you readers is to steer well clear, as so many overblown egos can only mean disaster. Many System officials are calling for a quarantine, in the hopes that Fake News does not become a Systemwide catastrophe. What can we do about Fake News? We prescribe a healthy dose of skepticism. Don’t blindly believe anything you read, see or hear. Don’t even trust yourself: who’s to say that your opinions are yours and not a symptom of Fake News? This is the only way to fight the characteristic delusion of Fake News. On the Space Rock we’ve opted for full-blown paranoia, and while we don’t necessarily recommend going as far as we have, we are at least safe from being total assholes.