A One-Dimensional Man Living on a Flat Earth
Dear Aunts,
My husband of 5 months thinks our planet is flat, despite the fact that he came from another planet and could literally see its spherical shape with his own twelve eyes before he landed. He’s insisting that if I don’t also conform to his belief he’ll leave and take our giant purple legged spider with him. He says that, as his wife, I shouldn’t contradict him, especially at parties where his boss is the guest of honour. I am trying to be strong. I don’t want to betray my own values but I love this guy of mine. Any help is useful.
From Xandreta, Zion 10
Dear Xandreta,
Don’t be a flat person, like your husband. Leave the jerk before he can leave you and take your giant spider. You don’t need him. You are a strong woman and you’ll be able to make it on your own without your horrible husband. If you’d like to come live with us on the Space Rock, our door is always open. No, really. Come visit us. It’s no trouble. We have plenty of space and all of us firmly believe that planets are pyramid shaped. Please, visit us. VISIT US.
Best, Your Aunts
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